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For Unto Us A Child is Born…..in the City of Spokane???

What could be more exciting than a Christmas baby? I have often heard my mother-in-law, Alice Carter, tell of getting the turkey in the oven one Christmas Day just before heading off to the hospital to give birth to her first son, my husband Randy. New life is exciting anytime, but there is something special about Christmas beginnings.

I had the privilege to partner with Life Center Church in Spokane this Christmas season to share how we can enter into life transforming friendship with the one who was the first ever Christmas baby. Clearly God had been preparing hearts. There were close to 400 women present on that Friday night and 300 on Saturday. When I gave the invitation to invite Jesus into their lives, so many responded, there was no way I could count. Many others made the decision to return to a friendship with Jesus after having allowed painful experiences to create distance between themselves and God.

One woman found me in the restroom after the event. She told me how the Holy Spirit had worked in her heart through my talk. I had accurately described her situation. She was disappointed with God for allowing a profound loss in her life, but that night, she had decided to go back to him and allow him to walk with her through her pain.

Many of us suffer deep grief at Christmastime. We need more than a touching story to warm our hearts for an hour or two. We need a hope with which to anchor our hearts to God. We need to take lean in to intimate friendship with Jesus and grab hold of the hope of Immanuel: God with us. My recent grief journey, along with the message of Friend Me have uniquely equipped me to deliver this message with passion and authenticity. God is redeeming my pain to draw women to himself.

My most accurate guess is that 60-70 women were reborn in Spokane that weekend. This is the first Christmas they will grasp the true meaning of Jesus’ birth on this planet: the promise of His presence. We are not alone. God is with us. Life’s struggles, hurts and losses cannot crush us. Those of us who share a deep friendship with Jesus are never without hope. Thank you for partnering with me to share this hope with others, and celebrating with me the new birth of many Christmas babies.

God wants to be our BFF – Friend Me Highlights

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“God Wants to be Our BFF”

I WANT TO SHARE this email I received from my friend Catherine. She was commenting on a section in Friend Me, in which I wrote about her creative strategies for initiating friendship.

Last week I read the chapter on how to make friends. Thanks for including me in it! One of the big lessons I’ve learned in that regard: if struggling to find a group that includes certain women I want to know – create the group – find a reason for them to become a group. God has “agreed” with this strategy a few times, put the kibosh on a few and totally “taken over” a few times to make groups I could never have imagined.

A time when God agreed: I didn’t know any of my neighbors in Alaska. I wanted to know the women on my street 1) for friendship and friendliness and 2) in case we had a natural emergency like bear invasion, moose stomping, earthquake, landslide, avalanche, power-outage or erupting volcano. Basically, I really wanted to know who had a generator! So, after praying and procrastinating I formed a neighbourhood book club. I was a little disappointed that just two women came to the organizational meeting, one of them the only neighbour who had greeted us the day we moved in, but God was on board. Five years later it was a friendly group of 13 neighbours who cared for each other very much and did not miss book club except for extreme emergency.

When God took over: After moving to Alaska God invited me into two years of solitude and the sweetest time with Him. He kept saying to me “know Me”, “know Me,” “know Me,” and “start a Bible Study” and “Wait,” “Wait,” “Wait,” until eventually I heard Him say “Now”. This group started out as a Bible study for women who worked in my husband’s office. A couple of the women on my mind were new Christians and new moms. Naturally, I assumed they would want my wisdom and would have the time after working all day and taking care of their families to come to a weekly women’s group. Uh…no. About 20 women came to the first meeting but over the next few months they dribbled away. This group went through a very rocky first year but morphed into a group of women from every diverse aspect of life in Alaska. It became a cohesive group of believing women committed to God and being there for each other.

I also started a Bible Study in Anchorage’s club for wives of oil and gas professionals. Our first study was “10 Smart Things Women Can Do to Build a Better Life” which not only introduced us to each other but also to God and how He impacts our daily life.

So, about your book, Friend Me….. I can totally relate to it and I thank you for reminding me how precious friends are, how God formed us to want them and that He wants to be our bff. I am asking God “Want me to start a group with this book?” He hasn’t said anything yet so I’m just letting that question float around in my heart and His. We’ll see!

What Caught Your Eye? – Women’s ministry

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Close Encounters of the God Kind.

What caught your eye this summer? How green everything was after June’s deluge? The comparative scarcity of traffic during rush hour? That girls’ shorts were getting awkwardly short again? I have been on a journey of intentionally noticing people…and trying to influence others to do the same. It has amazed me how many people carry their feelings close to the surface and are actually relieved to find someone with whom to share them.

All it takes is awareness, eye contact, a bit of courage, and a few words- and an ordinary encounter can become a divine appointment. This past summer, I had three memorable moments when I knew for sure that God had orchestrated a meeting. One was with Margaret, a recent widow who greatly needed both someone with whom she could share memories of her beloved husband, and the hope that she could one day see him again. Elizabeth was hiding from her co-workers in a parking lot outside her office building, desperate for wisdom to face some big decisions that changes in her workplace demanded. Geri is a Mormon woman I met in the gym last week. She is new in Calgary and asked quite a few questions. Upon finding I write books about how to live with purpose, she confessed needing all the help she could get after recently divorcing her bi-polar husband, the father of her six kids.

Someone once said that most people are only three questions away from tears. I have no problem believing that is true. What an opportunity for the intuitive, Spirit-led believer. We know where community, comfort, and wisdom are found! Whether our encounters are with strangers, co-workers, or neighbours, we have a responsibility and an opportunity to direct people to Christ and His Body.

This fall as I address people in six live venues, I will be challenging them with an acronym I’ve created to make personal evangelism easy: LIFT

L is for LOOK- Notice the people around you, try to discern their emotions, and ask yourself what you could say to open a conversation with them that demonstrates genuine concern.

I is for INTERCEDE- Pray for them and your interaction with them.

F is for FRIEND- In this case “friend” is a verb like on FaceBook. Reach Out!

T is for TALK- Eventually you may be invited to speak about your faith. Don’t miss the opportunity.

Everyone has a sphere of influence. I can’t LIFT the people in your world and you can’t LIFT the people in mine. That’s why God needs us all to see the people around us with spiritual eyes. Your gifts and prayers will enable me to spread this message.

If you’d like book Donna to speak at your event, retreat or gathering please contact her office at admin@straighttalkministries.com or fill out the form on the contact page!

The Wisdom of Sowing Sweet Peace –

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We often find ourselves embroiled in conflict. Each of us approaches the world with a unique perspective based on the lessons life has taught us. Those lessons are as individual as our DNA, family of origin, and the particular roads we have traveled. How can we expect to agree on matters of importance when we bring such divergent histories to the table?
Even Christians who attempt to base their important decisions on God’s Word disagree much of the time. If you don’t think so, count how many distinct Christian churches you pass on the way to work tomorrow and explain that to yourself.

To read more, head over to the Women’s Journey of Faith blog where I’m guest blogging today!

Friendship can get itchy.

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Most close friendships go through a season like the “seven-year itch” experienced by many married couples. Sadly, it’s at this point that many friends make the same mistakes as married couples who pull the plug and file for divorce, judging that the work required to repair the relationship would come at too great a price.

The price to pay is risk – the risk of emotional vulnerability. All relational repair is dangerous. It’s the one thing to risk baring your heart and sharing your unguarded self with a friend who makes you feel close, safe and accepted. It’s quite another to hazard your heart to someone you’re not even sure you still want in your life.

But a woman who doesn’t let her guard down, doesn’t speak her heart, and doesn’t listen to the heart of her friend will never experience the coziness of winter, warmed by the crackling fire of mature relationship. She won’t even know if such a state is possible. Many women describe themselves as lonely because they’ve never gotten to this place. They gave up in autumn and watched their friendships wither and die. All of the friendships God had brought into their lives have come and gone without ever reaching the tranquility of winter because these women have been too afraid to go deeper, where there’s risk of getting hurt and having to work to repair rifts in the relationship.

– an adapted excerpt from Friend Me – turning faces into lasting friendships.

To understand more about deepening your friendships – read Friend Me.

Are you interested in Donna share her stories of friendship and how to turn faces into lasting friendships contact her at donna@straighttalkministries.com .

Comfort Food for Thought

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I crave comfort. Unfortunately I am writing this in an airplane on an air sickness bag; the only paper I can find. We are descending and I’m not allowed to use my iPad. There is cold air blowing on me from an undisclosed location and the surly flight attendant is too busy to bring me a blanket. I am cramped and uncomfortable as I try to tuck my appendages under myself, in an effort to warm up, without annoying the other passengers.

I crave comfort. Not just today. And not just the physical kind. Admittedly, my past few years have been difficult ones and it isn’t unusual or unhealthy to seek relief. What is problematic is when I seek comfort the wrong way. I recently read COUNTERFIET GODS by Timothy Keller. According to Keller, our comfort can easily become our idol if we seek it instead of, or apart from God.

This resonates with me. When I am stressed, tired, and especially when I am sad, often I don’t take my neediness to my Father. Instead, I eat chocolate, read fiction, or cocoon in my soft, warm bed. None of these are evil – unless they replace God in my life.

When Jesus promised to send us the Comforter, He wasn’t pledging to send us an ample-bosomed Grandma who would smother us with kisses, cookies and carbs. He was promising an advocate, a counselor, a helper. In fact, the meaning of the word comfort has strayed from its origin. To us it means, more than anything else, ease and well-being; the absence of challenge or conflict. We avoid “uncomfortable” social situations, awkward conversations and confrontation. We enjoy the comfort of our favourite chair. We eat, drink and dress for comfort. But the original Latin portrays something quite different. Something much more in line with God’s definition of comfort. The prefix “com” means what is sounds like: come. The root word “fort” is where we get the contemporary word fortify. So what comfort really means is to come alongside and fortify or strengthen. A meaning suspiciously like the Greek word for the Holy Spirit, our Comforter.

“And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate (KJV -Comforter) who will never leave you.” – John 14:16 NLT.

For most of us – at least for me, when I am seeking comfort, I want to disengage in order to protect and provide for myself. It is all about relief and retreat. God’s version of comfort is meant to replenish and restore. My way assumes the role of a victim. God’s way assumes the stance of a warrior.

How do you seek comfort? Do you look for a way to soothe your wounded emotions, overtaxed brain, and exhausted body? Or do you go to God for strength and encouragement so you are prepared to reengage the roles he has assigned you?

You and I will never get rid of our toxic habits unless we replace them with healthy ones. So I am reminding myself often to pay attention to my soul. When I am in need of comfort, I realize that longing is my heart’s expression of homesickness for God. Through this soul-awareness, I am learning to run to the Comforter for hope, strength, courage and restoration through time spent in His presence.